What a Boy Wants

The Fool is never quite sure what boys want. Interestingly enough, the Fool’s most recent foray into the marriage question involved a suitor who was thoroughly captivated by her brains and charm. When asked about his expectations, however, he remarked that most of all he dreamed of a woman who would be awaiting his arrival from work every night. She had to cook too, he said, and cook well. While The Fool was not averse to cooking and believed the idea of waiting on her husband rather charming, she knew that the expectations of this enamoured suitor were incompatible with her own. Hence she was forced to send him on his way. She wonders still why he chose her, knowing what she was like and then expecting that somehow she might, after marriage, morph into a stay-at-home wife at his beck and call.

But The Fool knows only too well how very strange are the tastes of boys. The Fool had once naively imagined boys to be less finicky than girls, thinking that in fact they passively acquiesced to the wishes of their parents when it came to their marriage partners. Now The Fool knows differently, and what has been particularly instrumental in the changing of her mind is the following sign which she recently discovered posted in a boy’s room – a boy The Fool knows only too well. Said boy wears trucker shirts and drives huge tractors, but most of all he seems to delight in the strange sport that is throwing a sharp hook into the water along with other unusual accoutrements and waiting gleefully and endlessly for the innocent fish of the water to swim towards these delicious morcels of food without realizing for even a moment that they might be approaching their tragic demise.

Said boy has very clear expectations of his girl. In particular, she must be unafraid of worms and other slippery or sharp things. The sign below should enlighten confused readers and would-be applicants: