Thursday, February 16, 2006

I have absolutely no idea.

Although one would like to think that Asmaa makes fun of people for pure pleasure and mental stimulation, she has been instructing the masses through her actions for as long as she has been around. From her first years as a foul-odoured toddler, Asmaa has been teaching lessons to her followers. For example, one should never feed a baby any chocolate products, lest they elicit derriere retaliation. Over the many years that Asmaa has been bestowing wisdom upon her fans, several incidents are noteworthy. The most intriguing example of this took place a few weeks ago at an undisclosed location. Although the details are sketchy, as Asmaa prefers a degree of anonymity, it is reported that she said "to bounce like a ball, one must be the ball." Of course, it is known that since the heart-wrenching 98' accident involving her beloved multi-coloured bouncy ball, Asmaa has been in mourning. The Paparazzi make it difficult for her to travel, but she has some tricks up her sleeve. One breathtaking instance of Asmaa's ability to chase away annoying photographers was the 2001 event known as "the running of the bulls." Although no one knows why it is called "the running of the bulls," it scarred the involved photographers for life. She is reported to have stepped out of her house, make a few rude remarks and spray the photographers with a home-made special blend she calls "Pepper spray." According to one of the victims, "The pepper spray hurt my eyes, but that was temporary. The pain I feel inside from her hurtful comments – that will last a lifetime." The photographers are now truck drivers, a job that does not involve interacting with many living beings. Oh my God. Somebody kill me please.

14 comments:

Elizabeth said...

Asmaa, you are in rare form today!

hajera said...

"Oh my God. Somebody kill me please."

will be glad to oblige :D

Squeeky said...

Assalaamu Alaikum :D

haha What in the world .... And no, no one is going to kill you because your creativeness is very much needed. No matter how strange it can be ;)

Nauman said...

Interesting post. I found it very indicative of the life you must lead.

MnM310 said...

haha..i think ur posts are kind a wierd (no offense)...but i mean that in the nicest way possible cuz they're hella interesting @ the same time. :)

Asmaa said...

Elizabeth, unforunately I'm like this every day.

Hajera, it's good to know that I can always rely on you.

Squeeky, ummm I really doubt my creativity is needed.

Nauman, no one's really sure about the kind of life I lead. Even myself.

mnm310, none taken :D Hey, at least my posts make people scratch their heads once in a while.

faraz ahmed said...

Interesting post indeed :-)

Pakistani84 said...

I don't get it...
anyways wanted to thank you for responding to that anon and clearing up the Onenes of Allah.

I just read that response.

Asmaa said...

Faraz, another head-scratcher!

Pakistani84, I knew you wouldn't get it. You know that you're not at the same intellectual level as I am. >:) (What level is that, you ask? One where random idiocies make so much sense.)

brotherhood said...

u got another blog :o

olde woman said...

fab post : )

Asmaa said...

bro, yeah...it's a little different than this one.

Olde, it's ridiculous how cool you are.

Anonymous said...

No idea why.

*you might know who this is

Mohammad said...

OK this one made me laugh so hard my chest hurt!!!